aporeticelenchus:

chirabella:

Okay, but have you considered: Marius as the world’s awkwardest vampire.

You know what though, the more I think about this the more sense it makes. Marius Pontmercy

• Is already a “Baron”
• Wears all black
• Only goes out at night
• Has one Romance and one Germanic language down; can easily find some place with empty castles
• His father-in-law has slept in a coffin
• Has a track record of reworking his ethical system to whatever suits his strongest interests; would definitely be able to rationalize eating people
• Great at murder
• Frequently seems to not know what decade it is
• All his friends are dead

Advertisement