Fanfiction Written By Young People

lifeineroticapublishing:

emilysidhe:

• Freelance worker lives in huge, gorgeous house/apartment in expensive area despite never seeming to be working
• Characters work 8-5 office job with hour-long commute, but go to bed no earlier than midnight and get up in time for morning sex and long, leisurely cooked breakfasts every day
• Do these characters even have jobs?
• Single parent has way more communication with child’s teacher than is normal; leads to dating; administration somehow has no problem with this.
• “I know I could never afford this mansion, but it’s OK I inherited it.  No, paying property taxes isn’t difficult on my salary.  I don’t even know how much the place is worth.  Are property taxes a thing?”
• There are two levels of cooking skills:  gourmet food every time no recipe, and sets pot of boiling water on fire somehow.  No one is ever in between these two skill sets.  People on each level always end up dating each other.
• Despite the gourmet meals described needing like seven pots to cook, no one ever does dishes.
• Character shares a bottle of wine with their date (2 and half glasses each), and they both get falling-down drunk.
• Later, one of them drinks an entire bottle of whiskey by themselves and does not die.

Oh my god

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