Hagrid, what are you doing here? Where’s — James — and Lily?

Peter. Wah! Harry? I can take him. I’m his godfather! Dumbledore says he goes to Lily’s sister. Man, seriously? FUCK Dumbledore!

I’m his legal guardian. I can’t. He needs me! I can’t lose him, I’m all he has. I’m so sorry… Hagrid, give me Harry. Please don’t make me. Sirius, no! Stupefy.

Shit. Hey kid. Let’s go. Dear Remus, First: I apologize. Second: I kidnapped Harry. HELP. Don’t tell the order. -Padfoot

gingersnapwolves:

copperbadge:

resplendeo:

team-free-will-on-skaro:

spooky-ophelia:

kiyala:

isozyme:

Remus Lupin: Sirius you did what.

Inspired by this post and others by lotstradamus

#i want the 50k story of facepalming remus and panicked sirius with kidnapped baby harry on the run from dumbledore (via meh-guh)

theboredomisdeadly

Ok but hasn’t it been shown that a single stupefy wouldn’t be enough to have an effect on hagrid due to his giant blood?

clearly this means that hagrid pretended that the stupefy knocked him out, gently laid down on the ground so the baby wasn’t jostled, and pretended to snore while sirius ran the fuck away

possibly interrupting himself mid-snore to offer advice

*Hagrid sits up*

“SUPPORT ‘IS LI’IL HEAD, YE GREAT IDIOT!” 

*lies down*

*Sirius climbs on motorbike*

*Hagrid sits up again*

“DON’ FERGET TO BURP ‘IM AFTER A FEEDIN!”

*Motorbike zooms off*

*Hagrid sits up, cups hands and yells*

“AN’ MAKE SURE ‘E SLEEPS ON ‘IS BACK!” 

*lies down again for another five minutes for good measure*

then he lies there mumbling about how he shouldn’t’ve said that

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