tbh it makes me so sad how many girls dismiss their attraction to women
I’m not gonna label anyone’s sexuality for them but if you have crushes on girls then you’re probably not straight
because believe it or not there are women who never experience any attraction to women
it’s not some tiny little thing that everyone experiences
of course that’s not a bad thing, but no, not everyone is “a little bi” etc.
and we are all taught that relationships between women are inherently inferior to hetero relationships – it often takes years to realize that what you feel could be genuine attraction rather than just curiosity or admiration
whether or not you choose to acknowledge that in the label you choose for yourself or how you pursue relationships is up to you
but if you consistently finding yourself having crushes on women or being attracted to women – even if you remain adamant that you love and prefer men – you may want to look into the possibility that you’re not straight
this would have really helped me out when I was younger
I used to think I was straight bc of the normalization of “girl crushes”
Then I met a girl who was actually straight & vocal about it (not in a homophobic way, she just talks to me about her love life a lot)
And I realized that I was not as straight as I thought. I am not straight at all. Even on top of being asexual.
Maybe just explore it, it might make some things easier or some things harder, but.
“The normalisation of girl crushes” – that’s an excellent statement and it’s really terrifying. There’s plenty of ways bisexuality is oppressed and silenced by heteronormative culture, eg: bi erasure ensures that the challenge bisexuality offers both to the boundaries of sexuality and the othering of queer culture is rendered invisible (which is why you can’t dress, speak, or generally act in a bi way, whereas you can for monosexual queer identities).
The girl crushes thing is just another way for heteronormative culture to silence us. If you say that being attracted to people of the opposite gender occasionally is a “normal” part of heterosexuality, bisexuality is absorbed into heteronormativity and prevented from becoming its own identity. Which means that women can go their whole lives just shunting part of their sexuality into the Occasional Girl Crush box, so they can ignore a part of their identity.
And this is why I don’t believe any statistics about how many lgbt people there are in the world (10%, 20%, whatever). Because there must be thousands, millions of people who don’t even realise they aren’t straight, thanks to silencing norms like this.