“We’re gonna do this.”
bb-8 starts picking up swears from r2 and poe is appalled.
Imagine BB-8 rolling up to Rey and Poe like “beep beep beep guess what I just learned” like a small kid and saying “fuck” or something equally as startling for something as cute and important and both Rey and Poe look shocked and Poe’s jaw drops a little and Rey goes “where did you learn that!?” like that’s not something that is supposed to be in a military droid’s basic vernacular and it couldn’t have learned it from humans because most swears don’t compute into droid so it had to be a droid and the proud if scared beeping replies “R2-D2” and the next thing you know both Poe and Rey are running down the base after this ancient droid that’s screaming and beeping frantically like “IT WAS AN ACCIDENT I FUCKING SWEAR”
Luke and Leia dying of laughter in the background.
Force Ghost!Anakin looking sheepish and trying not to laugh too hard because it’s his fault.
so if BB-8′s “a BB unit”, does that mean there’s a BB-1 through 7?
Does this mean there were scary stories on the flight deck pre- or post-mission with Poe and Black Squadron? Imagine Poe with a light-stick beneath his chin and a glint in his eye, kneeling to speak in a spooky voice to BB-8.
“Hey, BB-8. Why is BB-6 afraid of BB-7?”
An inquisitive whirr.
“’Cause BB-7 ate 9!”
“!!!!” BB-8 rolls back and forth in panic while Poe falls over laughing.
“It’s okay, buddy. I didn’t mean it literally! It’s just a joke!” (A joke??) “Yeah, a joke!” BB-8 gently zaps Poe in retribution and rolls away, the droid-equivalent of a walking off in a huff.
“Ow, hey! Come on, BB-8, it was supposed to be funny!”
BB-8 doesn’t speak to him for the rest of the day, so Poe goes on a mission around base asking any and everyone if they’ve seen any droids, and joins the squadron table at dinner looking exhausted but triumphant. BB-8 is with them.
“Hey, BB-8, look!” He holds up a round, shrieking droid with a grin. “It’s BB-7!”
BB-8 beeps in alarm and hides behind the table leg while Poe gently explains that BB-7 is not really scary at all, see?
BB cautiously rolls out to investigate for itself. Cue gentle droid booping.
They become bosom buddies and roll everywhere together, collect the whole gang and then BB rolls up to Poe pre-flight sometime a week later, like ten minutes before take off. “BB-8, buddy where were you? we gotta go!” “!!” “what is it?” BB-8 is insistent.“!” “You wanna show me something? ok buddy but make it quick, it’s almost time to leave.”
BB-8 whistles and BB-6 rolls over in a panic, whirring. BB-8 whirrs at it and it whirrs back and all three of them turn towards BB-7 rolling determinedly along. BB-6 Ducks behind BB-8 as BB-7 rolls to a stop a few feet before reaching them. A smaller beep draws Poe’s attention to his feet where BB-9 sits, rocking back and forth in contentment.
All three droids beep back the joke in binary.
Poe cries laughing and doesn’t stop until the General herself contacts him on comms to ask what him the hold up is.
Okay but consider: the droids.
The fact that they clearly, CLEARLY rehearsed this little show before showing off to Poe on the tarmac just before the flight
BB-8 is a very strict producer ok
lots of beeeeeeep!!! and whirrrr bleeep!!!s when the others got it wrong
“no it has to be THIS WAY” “this is how Poe told it!” “do it OVER.”
bb8 knows what’s going on
I let out a very soft gasp
#‘its experiences’ did you mean:#poe dameron awake at 4AM singing BB-8 songs he makes up as he goes#poe dameron running back into a firefight to save a disabled BB-8 from certain destruction (sustaining a shoulder wound)#poe dameron speaking in binary even though BB-8 tells him he sounds absurdly stupid#poe
dameron sewing a little hole into all his tents so that BB-8 can charge
next to him while he sleeps even when they’re on recon missions#poe dameron referring to BB-8 as ‘my friend’ and making sure his programming equips him to fully understand what that means#poe dameron always asking BB-8 to do what he needs instead of ordering it#poe dameron rewriting the astromech default programming that would force BB-8 to call him master#poe dameron rebuilding BB-8 by hand himself whenever BB-8 gets damaged#and keeping his hard drive and his audio sensors live so he can reassure BB-8 as he goes that it’s all going fine#IS THAT WHAT YOU MEANT BY ‘EXPERIENCES’#DID YOU MEAN ‘POE DAMERON’#because that’s what BB-8 would mean#‘strong loyalty subprogram’ is one way to put it#‘loves poe dameron right back’ is another (via @gyzym)